Tag: 2010

Whirlwind

May can be summed up in one word: whirlwind.  Everything has changed, ended, begun, continued, stopped, started….  Everything is the same but everything is different.

I graduated.

I moved away from JBU, Siloam Springs, and my first “house.”

I moved home.

I realized I am a nerd and an athlete.

I had a week of random and mostly unidentifiable anxiety.

I went to and played in DIII Ultimate Frisbee Nationals in Appleton, Wisconsin.

I played my last game as a college ultimate frisbee player.

I added two states to my travel list: Wisconsin and Iowa.

I leave for a new adventure tomorrow.

I have spent and will continue to spend far too many hours in a car.

Whirl away May.

Graduate

I am a college graduate, as of May 8, 2010.

I am happy and content.  I’m sad to leave this season, these friends, this time of my life.  But this season is over and it’s time for a new setting.

And to any friends reading this…you’re stuck with me.  In all the change that is swirling around us…we’re still friends.

I have more words about this whole graduation business, but not now.  It’s time to rest.

Good job May. Keep it up.

Sneak-up May

Well that was interesting. April had mixed results. And May just suddenly appeared as I drove through Texas. Well, as I rode in a 15-passenger van through Texas.

If you’d told me a year ago that I would have gone to 5 Ultimate Frisbee tournaments as a PLAYER, I would have said you were insane.  Instead, I am insane.

April could have been better…but it was mostly better than March. So Jackson trip, consider yourself to have happened in April because I would like you to not be associated with March 2010.

In April I finished my senior project, had a lovely birthday, presented my senior project, creatively wrote a short story, and finished my undergraduate career with the exception of finals week. Some unpleasant things happened too.

So May, you’re going to be different. I have different expectations of you. Mostly because I have no idea what May will do.  Everything’s about to change. Which is both fabulous and horrifying. I hope it’s more fabulous than horrifying.

On an unrelated note, I found digestives at World Market. !!! Digestives are British tea cookies. And they’re amazing. And I don’t understand why there isn’t a World Market any closer than 5 hours away from me. Just like I don’t understand why there are no Half Price Books near me.

22

I’m 22 now. And I had such a good, full birthday that I’m up now late into the night finishing up my preparations for my Senior Seminar presentation.

I spent my day with some of the people I love the most–whom I won’t see frequently after the next few weeks.  Let’s not think about that right now.

In nine hours, I will be done. I will be free of Senior Seminar.  This is quite possibly one of the most exciting things that has happened to me in awhile.

Will I be less busy? No, of course not.

Good job April. Yesterday was a good day.

Lord, make life beautiful.

April Thus Far

April thus far has had mixed results.

My Senior Seminar paper is finally completed. I still have a presentation, but the paper is done. Of course, as I looked up a quote in it this evening for another paper, I found a typo.  It was 43 pages–there were probably more typos.  Hallelujah, I’m done with that paper.

It was just getting to the completed state that was difficult. And challenging. And stressful.  I don’t really know how I’ve managed to live my life this “April Thus Far.”  So much of life lately has been nutty, busy, crazy, and just plain ridiculous.  Some of that was fun. Some if it was not.

Despite the mixed results thus far, I remain confident that April will finish miles ahead of March.  The crazy won’t end–it never will.

In fact, I shouldn’t be writing this post at all. I should be finishing my 10-11 page paper on theology of disability that’s due tommorow or studying for my American Government test that’s tomorrow or reading for the president’s class or cleaning my room or preparing for my summer or any number of things.  However, lately, I have been choosing mental and emotional health over certain responsibilities. Like going to visit a best friend I hadn’t really talked to since beginning of February or going to Ultimate practice–when I should have been homeworking.  Somehow, though, everything gets done.

Time now to finish a research paper.  After writing a 43 page opus, adding five pages to a paper that needs to total 10 is no big deal.

April: please proceed awesomely. I’m depending on you.

April

April has arrived.

It’s already better than March. Partly because it’s just not March anymore. Partly because Senior Seminar will be done this month.

I think I’m going to be spending much of April being of two minds. I will want things to end quickly yet never end at all simultaneously. I think that’s just how the last days of a senior year at college go.

I just want to enjoy April.  April, please be nice.

Fabulous

I just spent a week in Jackson, Mississippi.  As the title of this post suggests, it was fabulous. I want to write on and process all of it.

However.

Real life is here. And sometimes, real life is unpleasant. I have wanted to scream a thousand times in the last couple days. On occasion, I have. Even though I need to process my trip…I can’t. I don’t have time.

I am overwhelmed.  With the exception of the bright and glorious sunshine that was my spring break in Jackson, March has been filled with frustration.  March is almost over. April, my most favorite of months is about to be here.

April 2010. Don’t disappoint. Please be as fabulous as other Aprils (except 2008, when I was sick on my birthday. Not ok, April, not ok) of my life. Attempt to be as fabulous as Jackson 2010.

If April goes well, I will officially remove my trip to Jackson from March to April in my head. If April doesn’t go well…..

I’d rather not think about that possibility.

The end of March has been just as frustrating as the beginning. March held such terrifying promise, only to be more terrifying than promising.  Yes, I realize that sounds crazy. If you lived in my head, it would make more sense.

April means many wonderful things: Easter, my birthday, spring, the winding down of the school year (although this year I have more mixed feelings about that than usual, seeing as this is my last traditional school year ever), the finishing up of projects, flowers, warm weather, and more.

April, come quickly.  And please, don’t disappoint.

Lord, come quickly. And please, send me a memo.

WordPress, you better press this. And please, send me freshly pressed apple juice.

Literature Review

This was supposed to be published on March 10. It wasn’t. It’s now March 29. WordPress, you fail. When I hit publish, I want you to publish. I shouldn’t need to triple check that a post has published.

I’m in the midst of writing my literature review of my senior seminar. I should be working on that instead of writing this.  However, I am distracted.

I’m only 10 days into March 2010 and already my life is vastly different from February 28, from January 31, from December 31.  I knew March 2010 would change my life and it will continue to do so.  Some of these March 2010 days are harder than others.

Too much is floating around in my head. This is unfortunate, because I’d like my thoughts to focus on this ginormous project I’m attempting to complete.  Other people’s problems and crazy, world events, classes that are wasting my time, arguments and frustration with the Lord, heart confusion, my own crazy, and more are competing with my researching and writing on church ministry to children with special needs.

I’m trying to enjoy the process, the journey, the path.  Right now, I’d like to put my responsibilities on pause and just do something completely crazy.

Alas. I don’t have time for that.